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Recaptured Love Intimacy with Prostate Cancer

over 50 couple kissing photo

Intimacy – sex and prostate cancer are all too often terms which are not associated with each other in the relationship of many couples. There are a host of reasons why this is the case. As someone who was diagnosed at the young age of 45 with advanced stage prostate cancer, I can tell you from firsthand experience that intimacy – sexuality and prostate cancer can happily coexist in any relationship.

Here are a couple of tips to bringing back the passion, fun and adventure in your relationship.

First and foremost: you have to gradually change your way of thinking of prostate cancer as something that “he” has. Prostate cancer doesn’t just affect one person in a relationship – it affects both of you.

One of the easiest ways to start this change of thought is to reduce your use of the words “he” and “I” when talking about prostate cancer.

How do you do this? Start by substituting the word “we” or “our” or “us” rather than “I” or “he” or “him.” For example when someone asks how your partner is doing with his treatments, say, “we’re doing really well.” It may take some time to get use to this, but trust me, it will pay dividends in your relationship.

Why is changing a few simple words important? It begins to subtly establish that the two of you, as a couple, have an overlapping and mutuality between you. As individuals this connection intertwines each of you in your relationship as a couple. Thinking of yourself as a “us” and not a “me” opens the door to intimacy.

Second: understand that intimacy and sexuality are healing forces. The more touching, caressing and kissing between you, prepares and charges your body to overcome emotional and physical hurtles that pave the way to pleasure.

One intimacy technique you can start today and each day after is; kissing your partner and holding your kiss for a minimum of 10 seconds. It may take you some practice, but you’ll both enjoy the work. As you’ll quickly see, 10 seconds is a lot longer than you may have thought. If you really want to give yourselves a challenge try it for 20 or 30 seconds. As a former high school and college wrestler I can tell you when you’re trying to keep from getting pinned and you’re on your back, 30 seconds is a very long time.

I often tell my martial arts students that “repartitions make the master.” So feel free to get in as many reps as you can each day of kissing.

Third: Open and honest couple communications is the key to improving your Intimacy with Prostate Cancer and intimacy regardless of any health issues. If you haven’t already done so, get your free copy of my short report on How to Improve Couple Communications. You can thank me later.

Photo by Earl – What I Saw 2.0

Happy Prostate Cancer Awareness Month – With a Kick in the Balls

Since 2003, September has been designated National Prostate Cancer Awareness Month. The most prevalent form of cancer among men, second only to skin cancer is Prostate Cancer and the second leading cause of cancer deaths among men. The question I ask is why…Why is Prostate Cancer Awareness Month, a month that places special emphasis on…

Welcome to Kevin Alexzander . Com

Greeting everyone and welcome to my blog. Wow, this has been a long time coming and I’m very happy you’ve decided to join me. The purpose of this site/blog and my other website/blog at Zanti is to allow my readers to really get to know and engage with me. As you can see from…

About Kevin Alexzander

Kevin Alexzander

Kevin is an Intimacy-Sex and Prostate Cancer expert. He is also an Intimacy with Prostate Cancer™ Coach and Speaker. In addition to his achievements in business, Kevin has trained and taught martial arts and self-defense for 30+ years. He is a former: Aide to a US Senator; Director of the Detroit Minority Business Development Center; Regional Director of the Michigan Small Business Development Center and Community Builder of the US Dept. of Housing and Urban Development. Kevin lives in SE Michigan with his cat Mr. Tibbs.


I love words. The word for today is:

fantasticate |fanˈtastiˌkāt|

verb [ with obj. ] rare 

make (something) seem fanciful or fantastic: I do not think I have fantasticated these accounts.

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